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Advertising Manager
How To Close Sales By Letter
Part V
Writing The Sales Letter
Chapter 18
Suppose
that your most obstinate "prospect"--a man in the next block on whom your
cleverest salesman had used every tactic and had been rewarded only by
polite turn-downs until he had lost hope-- should call up some afternoon and
ask you to send over a salesman. Would you dispatch the office boy? Or would
you send your star salesman? Yet if that prospect lived a hundred miles away
and sent in a letter of inquiry, one out of two firms would entrust the
reply to a second or third-rate correspondent--entirely forgetful that an
inquiry is merely a clue to a sale, and not a result in itself. This chapter
shows how to GET THE ORDER by letter
* * * * *
The man who inquires about your goods isn't "sold" by a long ways. He is
simply giving you an opportunity to sell him. Inquiries aren't results,
they're simply clues to possible sales, and if you are going to follow those
clues up and make sales out of them, you need the best men you can find and
the best letters those men can turn out to do it. Inquiries of good quality
are costly, frequently several times as costly as the advertiser figures in
advance that he can afford to pay. Yet, strange to say, many advertisers
will employ $50 or $100-a-week ability to write advertisements that will
produce inquiries and then expect $10 or $15 men to turn them into sales. As
a matter of fact nine times out of ten the hardest part of the transaction
is to close the sale.
An inquiry is merely an expression of interest. The reader of the
advertisement says, in effect, "All right, I'm impressed. Go ahead and show
me." Or, if he hasn't written in reply to an advertisement, he sends an
inquiry and invites the manufacturer or dealer to tell what he has. To get
the highest possible proportion of sales from each hundred inquiries,
requires that the correspondent be as skillful in his written salesmanship
as the successful man behind the counter is with his oral canvass and his
showing of the goods.
If the truth were known, it is lack of appreciation of this point that
discourages most concerns trying to sell by mail, and it is the real secret
of a large percentage of failures.
A clock manufacturer notified the advertising manager of one of the big
magazines that he had decided to discontinue his advertising. "The inquiries
we get from your magazine," he wrote, "don't pan out." The advertising
manager thought he saw the reason why and he made a trip down to the factory
to investigate. Reports showed that in two months his magazine had pulled
over 400 inquiries, yet out of that number just seven prospects had been
sold.
"Will you let me see your follow-up letters?" he asked. They were brought
out, and the advertising manager almost wept when he read them. Awkward,
hackneyed, blundering notes of acknowledgment, they lacked even the merest
suggestion of salesmanship. They would kill rather than nourish the interest
of the average prospect. He sent the set of letters up to the service bureau
of his magazine and a new series of strong convincing letters, such as the
clock deserved, were prepared.
On the strength of these he got the advertiser back in and the next month
out of 189 inquiries, forty-six clocks were sold. Think of the actual loss
that manufacturer suffered simply because he did not really appreciate that
inquiries aren't sales!
Get this firmly in mind and then get the proper attitude toward the
inquirer. There is a big difference between the original sales letter and
the answer to the inquiry. You haven't got to win his interest now. You've
got that. But you have got to hold it and develop it to the buying point.
Your man has asked you something; has given you the chance to state your
case. Now state it in the most complete, convincing way you know how.
Dear Sir:
We are pleased to receive your request for "Wilson's Accounting Methods,"
and a copy goes forward by today's mail. Do not fail to notify us if it
fails to reach you within a day of the receipt of this letter.
Your attention is particularly called to the descriptive matter on pages 3
to 9, inclusive. We are confident that among the forty stock record forms
there illustrated and described you will find a number that will save time
and labor in your office. You will see that our stock forms are carried in
two sizes--3 by 6-1/4 inches and 5 by 8 inches, the smaller size being
furnished at $2 a thousand and the larger size at $2.50 a thousand, assorted
as you desire.
Should you desire special forms to meet your individual requirements, we can
furnish them to order, printed from your copy, on one side of linen-bond
stock--your choice of five colors--at $3.50 a thousand.
On pages 116 to 139 you will find complete descriptions and order blanks of
our special introductory outfits, ranging in price from $1 to $22.
We make these attractive offers to enable our customers to select outfits
that can be installed at a very small cost, and we ship any of our stock
outfits with the distinct understanding that if they are not entirely
satisfactory they may be returned to us at our expense.
Under the liberal conditions we make, you incur no risk in placing an order,
and we trust that we may be favored with one from you right away. By
purchasing direct from us--the manufacturers--you eliminate all middleman's
profits and are sure to get proper service.
Let us hear from you.
Very truly yours, [Signature: Anderson & Anderson]
* * * * *
A letter that sums up well the principal features of the goods described in
detail in the catalogue and the strong points of the manufacturer's plan of
selling. The letter is closely linked with the catalogue. Such a letter as
this is a strong support to the catalogue
* * * * *
A good way to get at this is to put yourself once more in the other man's
place. What do you like to get when you answer an advertisement? And how do
you like to get it? First of all you like a prompt answer.
"I have had some experiences lately," says one business man, "that have made
me feel that promptness and careful attention to all of a correspondent's
requests are fully as important as the literary part of business
correspondence. I am interested in an enterprise in which material of
various kinds will be used--sample jars, mailing cases, and so forth. I have
been writing to manufacturers in the effort to get samples and prices.
"In several cases it really seemed to me as if the manufacturer was trying
to test my patience by waiting from three days to a week before answering my
letter. Several of them forgot to send the samples they referred to in their
letters. In other cases the matter of samples was overlooked for a few days
after the letter was written or the samples were ordered forwarded from a
distant factory without any explanation to me that the samples would be a
few days late in arriving. In still other instances references were made to
prices and sizes that were not clear, thus necessitating another letter and
a further delay of a week or ten days.
"As I had to have all the material before I could proceed with any of it,
one man's delay tied up the whole job.
"Really when one has a chance to see the dowdy, indifferent way in which a
great many business concerns take care of inquiries and prospective
customers, the wonder is that there are so many successes and not more
failures.
"How refreshing it is to get a reply by return mail from an enterprising man
who is careful to label every sample and to give you all the necessary
information in complete form and to write in such a way as to make you feel
you are going to get prompt, careful service if your order is placed with
him. It is a pleasure to send business his way, and we do it, too, whenever
we can."
It is easy enough to look out for these things when a regular method is
adopted. With a catalogue before him, the correspondent should dictate a
memorandum, showing what samples or enclosures are to be sent and how each
is to be marked. By referring to the memorandum, as he dictates, the
references will be clear.
Cherish both carefulness and promptness. You don't know what you sometimes
lose by being a day late. An inquirer often writes to several different
concerns. Some other correspondent replies by return mail, and the order may
be closed before your belated letter gets in its work, particularly if the
inquirer is in a hurry--as inquirers sometimes are. You may never learn why
you lost the order.
When you cannot give full attention to the request immediately, at least
write the inquirer and tell how you will reply fully in a day or so or
whenever you can. If you can truthfully say so, tell him that you have just
what he wants and ask him to wait to get your full information before
placing his order. In this way you may hold the matter open.
Dear Sir:
Replying to your esteemed favor of recent date would say that we have noted
your request for a sample of Royal Mixture and that same has been forwarded.
This tobacco is absolutely without question the finest smoking tobacco on
the market today. This statement will be substantiated by tens of thousands
of smokers.
We hope to receive your valued order at an early date and remain
Truly yours, [Signature: Brown & Co.]
* * * * *
The first paragraph of this letter is so hackneyed that it takes away all
personality, and there is nothing in the second paragraph to build up a
picture in the reader's mind of an enjoyable tobacco
* * * * *
Now as to the style and contents of your letter, here's one thing that goes
a long way. Be cheerful. Start your letter by acknowledging his inquiry as
though you were glad to get it. "Yours of the 15th received and contents
noted," doesn't mean anything. But how about this: "I was glad to find on my
desk this morning your letter of the 15th inquiring about the new model
Marlin." There's a personal touch and good will in that. A correspondence
school answers a prospective student's inquiry like this: "I really believe
that your letter of the 6th, which came to me this morning, will prove to be
the most important letter that you ever wrote." An opening such as this
clinches the man's interest again and carries him straight through to the
end. Don't miss an opportunity to score on the start.
Dear Sir:
Your order for a sample pouch of Royal Mixture is greatly appreciated. The
tobacco was mailed to-day.
To appreciate the difference between Royal Mixture and the "others," just
put a little of it on a sheet of white paper by the side of a pinch from a
package of any other smoking tobacco manufactured. You won't need a
microscope to see the difference in quality. Smoke a pipeful and you will
quickly notice how different in mellowness, richness and natural flavor
Royal Mixture is from the store-bought kind.
If you are not enthusiastic over its excellence I shall feel greatly
disappointed. So many discriminating pipe smokers in all sections are
praising it that it makes me believe that in "The Aristocrat of Smoking
Tobacco" I have produced an article that is in fact the best tobacco money
can buy.
Royal Mixture is all pure tobacco, and the cleanest, best-cured and finest
leaf that the famous Piedmont section of North Carolina can produce. The
quality is there, and will be kept as long as it is offered for sale. Depend
upon that.
The more you smoke Royal Mixture the better you'll like it. This is not true
of the fancy-named mixtures which owe their short-lived popularity to pretty
labels, fancy tin boxes and doctored flavors. I give you quality in the
tobacco instead of making you pay for a gold label and tin box.
The only way to get it is by ordering from me. Royal Mixture goes right from
factory to your pipe--you get it direct, and know you are getting it just
right, moist and fresh.
Right now, TO-DAY, is the time to order. A supply of Royal Mixture costs so
little and means so much in pipe satisfaction that every hour of delay is a
loss to you. It's too good to do without. Money refunded promptly if you are
not satisfied!
If it is not asking too much of you, I would like to hear within a day or
two just how the tobacco suits you. Will you not write me about it? Be
critical, as I desire your candid opinion.
Respectfully yours, [Signature: Wallace E. Lee]
* * * * *
The letter is here rewritten, making it interesting from the first line to
the last. It makes one feel that Royal Mixture is something unusually good
* * * * *
Second, be sure you answer the inquiry--every point in it. You know how
provoked you are when you ask a question and the correspondent in replying
fails to answer. Be sure you answer all the questions of the inquiries you
handle. Give letters a final reading, to be sure. It is often advisable to
quote the inquirer's questions or to use side-heads so he will understand
you refer to the questions he asked.
For example, suppose a real estate agent receives an inquiry about a farm.
The inquiry can be clearly answered by adopting a style like this:
We are very glad to give you details about the Abbott farm in Prescott
County.
LOCATION.--This farm is on the macadam road between Frederick and
Whittsville, three miles from Frederick. There is a
flag station on the D. &
L. railroad one and a quarter miles from the farm gate on the macadam road.
TRANSPORTATION FACILITIES.--There are six trains a day on the D. & L. road
that will stop at the flag station mentioned. These trains give a four-hour
service to Baltimore.
* * * * *
This style of letter is a great aid to the writer in bringing related points
together and thus strengthening description and argument.
If the inquiry involves the sending of a catalogue, hook the letter and the
enclosure together by specific references. It adds immensely to the
completeness of your letter. And don't be afraid to repeat. No matter what
is in the catalogue or booklet that is sent along with the letter, the
letter should review concisely some of the most important points. The
average person will pay closer attention to what is said in the letter than
to what appears in the catalogue. The letter looks more personal. For
example:
On page 18 you will see described more fully the cedar chest that we
advertise in the magazines. Pages 20 to 28 describe higher-priced chests.
All these chests are of perfect workmanship and have the handsome dull
egg-shell finish. The higher-priced models have the copper bands and the
big-headed nails. Use the order blank that appears on page 32 of the
catalogue, and be sure to read the directions for ordering that appear on
page 30.
* * * * *
These descriptions and references tie the letters strongly to the enclosures
and thus unify the entire canvass.
The woman who gets a letter telling her that the refrigerator she inquired
about is described and illustrated on page 40 of the catalogue sent under
separate cover, and then reads some quoted expressions from people in her
town or state who have bought these refrigerators, is more likely to order
than if a letter is sent, telling her merely that the catalogue has been
mailed under separate cover; that it gives a complete description but that
any special information will be given on request. The first method of
replying makes it appear that the correspondent is enthusiastic about his
refrigerators and really wants to sell the inquirer one. The second method
is cold and indifferent. If your goods permit the sending of samples by all
means enclose some with the letter. They permit the actual handling of the
article, which is so great an advantage in selling over the counter. And
then insure attention. No man, for example, will throw away a haberdasher's
letter referring to spring shirts if samples are enclosed. The samples will
get some attention, though the one who received them may not need shirts at
the time.
Samples also give an opportunity to emphasize value. For instance, it is a
good plan to say: "Take these samples of outings to your local store and see
if you can get anything at $25 that is half as good as what we are offering
you." The fact is, few people make such comparisons, but the invitation to
compare is evidence of the advertiser's confidence. For that matter, few
people ask for refund of money on honest merchandise, provided the refund is
limited to a brief period; but the promise of instant refund when
unsatisfactory goods are returned, is a great confidence-creator.
It is not always possible for one correspondent to handle the entire
inquiry. In that case it is well to let the answer indicate the care
exercised in preparing it.
A part of a letter may sometimes advantageously refer to some other
correspondent who can deal more thoroughly with a technical matter under
discussion. A large mail-order concern employs a man who can tell customers
in a tactful way just how to make coffee and tea, and he makes satisfied
customers out of many who otherwise would believe that they had received
inferior goods. This same man is also an expert in adjusting by letter any
troubles that may arise over the company's premium clocks, and so forth.
Unless such technical matters are extensive enough to require a separate
letter, they can be introduced into other communications by merely saying:
"On reading what you have written about the engine, our expert has this to
say:"
* * * * *
Dear Sir:
Your esteemed inquiry has been received, and we are sending you one of our
booklets.
In case none of the samples suit you, let us know what colors you like and
we will send more samples.
We can save you money on trousers. A great many of the best dressers of New
York and Chicago are wearing trousers made by us.
You run no risk in ordering, for if the trousers are not as I represent them
or do not fit you, we will correct the mistake or refund your money.
We urge you to order immediately, as we may not have in stock the patterns
you prefer.
Trusting to receive your order at an early date.
Truly yours. [Signature: Edward Brown]
* * * * *
This letter starts out with a hackneyed opening and not enough emphasis is
put on the samples. It is a mistake to make the suggestion that the samples
sent may be unsuitable. The third paragraph starts out with an assertion
unbacked by proof and the second sentence is a silly boast that no one
believes. A man does not pay his tailor the full price until the trousers
are completed. It is a weak selling plan to try to persuade a stranger to
send the entire price to an advertiser whom he knows nothing about. The plea
for an immediate order on the ground that the pattern may not be in stock
later is a weak and unfortunate method of argument. The final paragraph is
as hackneyed as the first, and fails to impress the reader
* * * * *
Dear Sir:
Here you are! This mail will bring you a sample book containing some of the
neatest trousers patterns you have seen in a long time. Tear off a strand
from any of them and hold a match to it; if it doesn't "burn wool" the laugh
is on me.
You may wonder why I can undersell your local dealer and yet turn out
trousers that "make good." Certain conditions, of which I shall tell you,
make this possible.
In the first place, trousers are my specialty. Other tailors want suit
orders above all, but I have built up my business by specializing on
trousers alone.
I buy my fabrics from the manufacturers in large quantities at wholesale
prices. The saving--the money that represents your retailer's profit--comes
to you.
I don't need an uptown "diamond-front" store, with an exorbitant rental.
Instead, I employ the best tailors I can find.
The trousers I make are built, not shaped, to fit you. We don't press them
into shape with a "goose," either. All our fabrics are shrunk before we cut
them at all. Sewn throughout with silk, the seams will not rip or give. And
style--why, you will be surprised to see that trousers could have so much
individuality.
I could not afford to sell just one pair of trousers to each man at these
prices. It costs me something to reach you--to get your first order. You
will order your second pair just as naturally as you would call for your
favorite cigar.
I am enclosing three samples of $6 London woolens. These have just come
in--too late to place in the sample book. Aren't they beauties?
Please don't forget that I guarantee to please you or to return your money
cheerfully. I ask for the $1 with order only to protect myself against
triflers.
May I look for an early order?
Yours, for high-grade trousers. [Signature: Chas R. Greene]
* * * * *
An interesting beginning, inviting proof of quality. Facts show why low
prices can be quoted, followed by graphic description and logical argument.
The samples give point to the letter and the plain, fair selling plan makes
an effective ending
* * * * *
Then again, make your letter clear. Good descriptions are just as important
in answers to inquiries as in letters that have the task of both developing
interest and closing a sale. All that has been said in previous chapters as
to the value of graphic descriptions and methods of writing them applies
with full force to this chapter. The letter that is a reply to an inquiry
can properly give more detailed and specialized description than a letter
that is not a reply to an inquiry, for in writing to one who has inquired
the correspondent knows that the reader of the letter is interested and will
give attention to details if they are given clearly and attractively.
Generally speaking, a sales letter that is in response to an inquiry should
make it unnecessary for the reader to ask a second time for information
before reaching a decision.
And this leads to one big important point: do your best to close the sale in
this first reply. Don't leave loop holes and uncertainties that encourage
further correspondence. Give your letter an air of finality. Lay down a
definite buying proposition and then make it easy for your man to accept it.
* * * * *
WHAT WILL MAKE REPLY EFFECTIVE
PROMPTNESS COMPLETENESS ANSWER ALL QUESTIONS GIVE FULL DETAILS CLEARNESS
MAKE FURTHER LETTERS UNNECESSARY LABEL SAMPLES PLAINLY DEFINITE PROPOSITION
GUARANTEE OF SATISFACTION MAKE ORDERING EASY INDUCEMENT FOR QUICK ACTION
* * * * *
Guarantees, definite proposals, suggestions to use "the enclosed order
blank," are important factors in effective closing paragraphs. Don't put too
much stress on the fact that you want to give more information. Many
correspondents actually encourage the inquirer to write again and ask for
more information before ordering. Try to get the order--not a lot of new
questions.
Experiments show that the interest of an inquirer wanes rapidly after the
receipt of the first response. In replying to inquiries, the chance of
securing a sale with a third letter is much less than the chance with the
first, for after receiving the first letter, if it is unconvincing, the
inquirer is likely to come to an adverse decision that cannot afterwards be
easily changed. In this respect, answers to inquirers are much like
unsolicited letters sent out to non-inquirers and planned to create and
build up interest. In a number of lines of business the third letter sent
out in response to an inquiry barely pays for itself. For this reason, it is
usually poor policy in handling this class of business to withhold some
strong argument from the first letter in order to save it for the second or
the third. Better fire the 13-inch gun as soon as you have the range.
If the first answer fails to land the order, the advertiser may follow up
with an easier plan of payment, a smaller lot of the goods, or make some
other such inducement. Not all goods admit of offering small lots, but when
this can be done, the argument may be made that there is no profit in such
small orders, that the offer is only made to convince the inquirer of
quality.
Some very successful correspondents close in the direct-command style:
"Don't delay; send your order NOW." "Sit right down and let us have your
order before you forget it." "It isn't necessary to write a letter; just
write across the face of this letter 'I accept this trial offer', sign your
name and send the sheet back to us in the enclosed envelope." Such closing
sentences are strong, because the reader is influenced to act immediately,
and the loss that usually comes about by reason of people putting things off
and forgetting is reduced. The third example is particularly good because it
eliminates letter-writing, which is a task to many and something that is
often put off until the matter is forgotten.
Other correspondents, instead of using the direct command style, close in
this way: "We are having a big sale on these porch chairs. If you order
immediately we can supply you, but we cannot promise to do so if you wait."
"We know that if you place your order you will be more than well pleased
with your investment."
If prices are to be increased on the goods offered, the correspondent has a
first-class opportunity to urge an immediate response: "There is just two
weeks' time in which you can buy this machine at $25. So you can save $5 by
acting immediately."
Experience shows that the increased-price argument is a good closer.
In the final sentences of the letter should be mentioned the premium or the
discount that is given when the order is received before a certain date.
These offers are effective closers in many cases. In making them it is well
to say "provided your order is placed in the mails not later than the 10th,"
for such a date puts all on the same footing no matter how distant they are
from the advertiser.
Finally, don't overlook the opportunity to make even the signature to your
letter contribute something.
Firm signatures are rather lacking in personality. "Smith & Brown Clock Co."
hasn't much "pull" to it. But when the pen-written name of Albert E. Brown
appears under this signature the letter has much more of the personal
appeal. For this reason, many concerns follow the practice of having some
one put a personal signature under the firm name. It is not desirable, of
course, to have mail come addressed to individuals connected with the firm,
but this can be avoided by having return envelopes, addressed to the firm,
in every letter. In fact, a little slip may be enclosed reading: "No matter
to whom you address an order or letter always address the envelope to the
firm. This insures prompt attention."
At least one large clothing concern has found it profitable to let its
letters go out over such signatures as "Alice Farrar, for BROWN & CO." Those
to whom Miss Farrar writes are informed that the inquiry has been turned
over to her for personal attention--that she attends to all requests from
that inquirer's section and will do her best to please, and so on.
When methods of this kind are followed and it becomes necessary--because of
the absence of the correspondent addressed--for some one else to answer a
letter, it is well to say. "In the absence of Miss Farrar, I am answering
your letter." Never let an inquirer feel that the one he addresses is too
busy to attend to his wants or is not interested enough to reply. When the
busiest presidemt of a business concern turns over to some one else a letter
intended for the president's personal reading, the correspondent should say,
"President Parkins, after reading your letter, requests me to say for him,"
and so on.
These little touches of personality and courtesy are never lost. They create
a cumulative business asset of enormous value.
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